Bar Tipping Etiquette

• Dry Bar Tipping Etiquette
• Sushi Bar Etiquette Tipping
• Bar Mitzvah Tipping Etiquette
• Tipping Etiquette For Wedding Vendors

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Last week, we introduced you to our new series Bad Bar People by investigating the scourge known as The Jukebox Violator. This week, in honor of one of the busiest bar weekends in the country, we take a look at Bad Bar People #2: The Lousy Tipper.

Bar etiquette: The do's and don'ts of drinking at a bar. Do tip 20 percent based on what the total check should have been. Even when half the check is taken off as a courtesy, a regular. Bar and Restaurant Tipping Guide. This is a bar and restaurant tipping guide. It teaches the proper way to tip the food servers, cocktail waitresses and bartenders. It also contains a restaurant tip calculator, a bar tip calculator and a tip chart. Note: If you are interested more about the etiquette of tipping, please visit the Tipping Etiquette.

One of the most notorious and hotly debated examples of The Lousy Tipper comes to us from eminent Philadelphia dive bar McGlinchey's, that nexus of cigarette smoke, claustrophobic bathrooms, 75-cent hot dogs, and ridiculously cheap drinking.

Back in May 2014, some Ivy League bros from UPenn broke unofficial McGlinchey's protocol by ordering four kamikaze shots in the middle of an insanely busy night. The total came to $25.60. One of the bros handed the bartender a new $100 bill, and when she got to the register, she realized that there were actually two new $100 bills stuck together.

When the bartender walked back to the UPenn bros, she handed them $174.40 — $74.40 in change plus the extra $100 bill they didn't realize they gave her. And for her trouble, they tipped her a whole forty cents of which she received twenty, splitting the tip with the second bartender. Bad bar tipping etiquette at its worst.

'It happens all the time,' says Jo-Ann Rogan, the bartender in question. Rogan, a mother of two, has worked at McGlinchey's off and on since 1991. These days, you can find her behind the bar on Thursday and Friday nights.

Best game to gamble on. Rogan says that it's not just Ivy League brats who have bad bar tipping etiquette. The behavior knows no class, racial, social or religious boundaries.

'Sometimes they are suit-and-tie people,' explains Rogan. 'They might have three rounds of our fanciest beer and leave a dollar when they leave. Or sometimes you'll get nine kids who have two pitchers and leave two dollars. That's not OK.'

Thankfully, there are the over-tipping regulars who help make up for the deficit caused by the Lousy Tipper. 'Without them, I wouldn't survive,' she insists. 'We get almost nothing for shift pay, and these tips mean a big difference to my family.'

But one bartender we spoke with at a suburban watering hole said that sometimes the regulars are the biggest offenders of bar tipping etiquette, some not leaving a tip at all. (He asked us to withhold both his name and that of the bar, where we witnessed the activity in question.) They'll sit there for hours, spending a good deal of money on beer and booze, and then they just leave.

He told us about one, who adds insult to injury.

Dry Bar Tipping Etiquette

'Every single time that he leaves, he'll leave a drink on the bar that he took maybe one or two sips out of,' complains the bartender. 'He could have just left me that money as a tip. It still wouldn't be enough, but it would be something.'

So what's going on here? Have we suddenly had an influx of European tourists?

'Some people just don't get it,' says Rogan. 'I don't think they're trying to be mean. Some people don't have a lot of money, but those people probably shouldn't be out drinking.'

Don't want to be known as The Lousy Tipper? Let this handy guide to bar tipping enlighten and enrich you.

• So how much should I tip a bartender? At most bars, let A Buck Per Beer be your mantra when establishing a minimum tip. Now, if you're at a bar where a beer is $2, you might think, Wait a second… If I tip a buck a beer, that's a 50-percent tip! Yes, yes it is. And that's OK.

Sushi Bar Etiquette Tipping

• Don't confuse this with A Buck Per Order. If you order a round consisting of five bottles of beer for you and your buds, your tip should be at least $5. You may think to yourself, But they're not really doing five times the amount of work. And if you're thinking that way, you should just go home. Let us reiterate: A Buck Per Beer.

• If your drink costs more than $5, you need to start thinking along the lines of the 20-percent rule that you are (hopefully) following in restaurants. Again, this is a minimum. So if you order a $14 Martinez at the Olde Bar in Old City, don't think you're doing the bartender any favors by leaving him a buck.

• If you are paying with cash, stick to integers. Using the example of the $14 Martinez, if you were to apply a strict 20 percent rule to the tipping equation, you'd come up with a tip of $2.80. If it's not obvious to you that you should leave at least three bucks on the bar instead of asking for change, you're doing it wrong. Keep your nickels to yourself. If you're paying with a credit card, do what you will, but rounding up is always a good idea.

• But what if I order a $10,000 bottle of wine? Am I really supposed to leave a $2,000 tip? First of all, we're talking about bars here. Not fancy restaurants with $10,000 bottles of wine on the menu. Second, if you're ordering $10,000 bottles of wine on a regular basis, give us a call. Third, we defer to New York Times columnist and former restaurant critic Frank Bruni.

• Things can get a little bit confusing when the bartender says, 'This round is on me.' If they're buying you a drink, chances are 10-to-1 that you are a friend or at least a regular, and you probably have an established tipping relationship. But if it's a new setup, be sure to return the generosity with generosity. Some people would tell you that you should tip what the drink would cost plus what you would have tipped on it if charged, and if you want to do that, more good karma for you. Others would suggest that tipping the amount of the free item is essential, and we think that's a fine idea. But if a bartender comps you a $12 cocktail, you're probably not in danger of landing in the cheapskate file if you leave a five spot, assuming that your tipping standards are up to snuff for the other rounds.

• Don't encourage theft. We know there are plenty of bars out there where you slide a twenty across the bar when you arrive, and you can drink for free all night. And we just can't get behind that. Some bar owners give bartenders a certain number of comps that they can give out per night. At other bars, the bartender actually has to put money in the till if they want to comp you, so that they mean it literally when they say, 'That drink's on me.' But we're pretty sure there are no bar owners out there telling the staff, 'It's perfectly OK with me if you pocket a $20 tip and give away the bar all night.' A tip should never be a payment or incentive for a free drink.

• Don't use your status as a foreign national as an excuse to not tip or to severely undertip. We get that some places in the world do not have tipping cultures. But if you're going to hang out in our bars, you're going to have to abide by our tipping culture. So pay up, Frenchy.

• If you can't pay, don't come out to play. It's that simple. Gratuities need to be part of your drinking budget. So if you're going out on Friday night with $20 in your pocket and you're at a place that serves $4 beers, enjoy four, leave a four dollar tip, and take your ass home.

You may have recently spotted an article in the New York Times about tipping — or more accurately, an article about 'tip creep,' the term used to describe rising gratuities across service industries of all kinds. Interestingly enough, though, the thing about this article that most of us have latched onto doesn't concern 'tip creep'; it concerns whether or not you tip for coffee. The question led to a rather spirited conversation here at Bustle HQ, which made us all realize that we really, really need to brush up on our tipping etiquette.

Does culturally embedded tipping as a practice kind of suck? Yes. But until a major paradigm shift happens wherein tipping is suddenly recognized for the bullshit that it is, we all still have to follow the rules. Or, okay: Maybe we don't have to follow them, but if you're a decent human being, you will, because tips are often the difference between a server making enough to pay their rent that month or not. In the U.S, if anyone has delivered you any type of service — they made you a latte, they pulled you a beer, they provided table service, they gave you a rockin' haircut, they did some heavy lifting for you — generally you should expect to tip them; in case you've got a few questions, though, here are 17 pieces of tipping etiquette everyone should know (unless you go to another country, in which case it's a whooooooole 'nother ball game):

1. Get familiar with a few common percentages:

The Emily Post Institute offers the following guidelines for food service:

• Wait service at a sit-down restaurant: 15 to 20 percent of the pre-tax bill.
• Wait service at a buffet restaurant: 10 percent of the pre-tax bill.
• Delivery: 10 to 15 percent of the bill. A good rule for pizza is to tip between two and five bucks — BUT, if you ordered a lot of pizzas (Super Bowl party, anyone?), tip more.
• Bartenders: $1 to $2 per drink or 15 to 20 percent of your total tab (if tabs are a thing you do. I don't, but that's just me).

2. Technically there's no obligation to tip in these situations:

• Tipping jars
• Hosts and maitre 'ds
• Takeout you pick up yourself

3. ..BUT, there are exceptions:

• Tipping jars: Here's where the coffee thing comes into play. If you're a regular at your favorite coffee shop and they always have your drink waiting for you when you walk in the door, put a buck in the jar per drink. If you ordered a drink that requires some fancy preparation (lattes, Frappuccinos, and so on — pretty much anything but drip coffee and the kind of tea that involves them giving you a cup of hot water and a tea bag), put a buck in the jar per drink. If your barista goes above and beyond for you in any other way, put a buck in the jar per drink. Remember that whole 'being a decent human being' thing? This is it in action.
• Hosts and maitre d's: Again, the key words here are 'above and beyond.' Did you show up at the most exclusive restaurant in town without a reservation on an incredibly busy night, and the host found a table for you anyway? Tip them $10 to $20.
• Takeout: Did they give you curbside delivery? Did you have a large and extremely complicated order? Tip 10 percent.

4. What about smoothie shops? Ice cream shops? Other shops that aren't sit-down places, but which have tipping jars?

Follow the tipping jar etiquette described above. Generally, the rule is $1 or $2 per smoothie/sundae/whatever. Look at it as being in the same vein as how you tip a bartender.

5. Don't penalize the waitstaff for things someone else screwed up.

Waitstaff are in the unenviable position of not only waiting on you hand and foot (but remember: There's a difference between 'serv er ' and 'ser vant !'), but also of being the face of the restaurant. This means that a lot of the time, they bear the brunt of every single customer's ire, should something go wrong. Did the kitchen screw up and forget to make your food, even though the server followed protocol and put your order in just the way they were supposed to? Don't punish the server for that. They're the only people who get hurt by it, and it's not even their fault in the first place. Tip as you would normally, and if there's an issue of any sort, talk to management about it (nicely! Don't be a jerk!).

6. If your table service is really terrible…

Originally I was going to say, yeah, go ahead and tip less; others, however, might feel otherwise. My take on it was this:

Is the entire place restaurant full and your server is literally the only one on the floor? They're probably absolutely slammed and doing the best they can under the circumstances. There are only so many places one person can be at once; management should have had more waitstaff on the schedule to handle it all. Don't stiff your server. If, however, the place is practically empty, your server ignores you for extreme lengths of time, and you keep catching them hanging out at the bar and watching the game instead of doing their job? First try to talk to someone about it (again, nicely! No unnecessarily jerky behavior, please!); then if they continue to not do their job, then I would say go ahead and tip less. I say this as a former service industry worker myself, by the way. I have no patience for people who don't do their jobs.

But, as Gothamist pointed out last spring, docking the server also means you're docking the folks they share their tips with (because that's a thing, in case you didn't know — waitstaff 'tip out' table busers, back of staff, and a whole lot of other people, all of whom also helped get your food to your table). It's a good point, so it might be worth going with Gothamist's suggestion instead: Leave a 20 percent tip as usual, but to talk to the manager about the server.

7. Don't leave passive-aggressive notes instead of tips.

Remember that whole 'talk to someone about the problem first' thing? DO IT. Servers and/or management can't fix the problem if they don't know there's a problem in the first place. Also, no matter how awful your server was, leaving a note in the tip line that says 'NO TIP YOU SUCK' is just mean.

8. Don't tip anyone in the love of whatever deity in which you believe.

Jeff the God of Biscuits may love them, but it's not going to help them pay their rent.

9. Don't not tip because 'you don't believe in it.'

You know how much servers earn per hour in the U.S.? Usually around $2 or $3. It's true that if, after tips, they don't make minimum wage, their employers are supposed to make up the difference; however, when you don't tip waitstaff, you're not fighting the good fight against the tipping system. The restaurants themselves don't really feel any heat from it; you're just screwing the servers. That's not how to change things.

10. If you're at a restaurant that has abolished tipping, congrats! You don't have to tip.

This is how to change things: Support places that have already gotten rid of tipping and pay their staff a livable wage. Everybody wins!

11. It's OK to use the 'custom amount' function on electronic payment apps.

Seriously. It's OK. You can do it if you really, really want to. But if it's a tipping situation, don't use it to leave no tip at all. All the other rules still apply.

12. Salon services get 15 to 20 percent.

Whether it's a haircut, a manicure, or a waxing, salon services should always get a 15 to 20 percent tip, according to Emily Post.

13. At hotels, doormen and bellhops are tipped positions..

They brought your bags up to your room? Tip a buck or two per bag. They hailed you a cab! Tip another buck or two. They delivered your room service? Between $1 and $3 is a good number to shoot for.

14. ..As is the concierge in certain circumstances…

There's no obligation to tip if they answer simple questions for you, but send $5 to $10 their way if they book restaurant reservations for you or get you tickets for an event. Where those reservations or tickets really hard to get? Tip a little extra ($15 or 10 to 20 percent of the ticket price).

15. ..And don't forget about housekeeping.

They're cleaning up after you, after all. Aim for $2 to $5 per day left in your room — there's usually an envelope for you to put it inside, or you can leave it with a note that says, 'Thanks, housekeeping!' Emily Post suggests leaving the gratuity daily, but others leave it all in one lump sum when they check out; which method you use is really up to you, although if you leave it by the day, you'll know it's going directly to the person who cleaned your room that day.

16. Movers: Also people you should tip.

According to iTipping, how much you should tip the guys and gals who get your couch, your bed, and all your other stuff from your old apartment to your new one can vary; five percent is about as standard as it gets, though. Also, if you're moving on a weekend, definitely tip well. No one likes to work on weekends.

Bar Mitzvah Tipping Etiquette

17. And above all, if you can't afford to tip, don't engage in anything that requires it.

Seriously. Yes, it sucks that minimum wage and tipping conventions in this country are such that we need to do a little mental math and make sure we can take on 20 percent more at the end of a meal — but if you aren't able to afford to do it in the first place, then don't eat out. Similarly, don't take taxis (unless it's Uber, I suppose, since technically you're not supposed to tip Uber drivers). Or do any other thing that calls for tipping. Stay home and save the money you would have spent on your tip-less bill instead.

Tipping Etiquette For Wedding Vendors

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